Hard times in New York Town

Tag: Welcome to my life as a failed writer

Shut up, Mommy is following on twitter

Sad Twitter

My witty cousin gave me the smart advice to subscribe to Twitter (Mom, if you read this:

Over the last two weeks, I have spent more time managing to get 7 followers on Twitter, than raising two toddlers who are rocking their terrible two’s. Plus it’s a constant source of stress because followers are apparently hard to catch, but even harder to keep (they look just like bees, foraging all over the place).

Over the last two weeks, I have followed basically everyone, first Benjamin Biolay because ah well, it’s Benjamin Biolay. Then most French newspapers. Then random fashion bloggers. Then random bloggers. Now my poor Twitter account is bursting out of random tweets.

Not sure my nerves will make it till 10 followers.

My adorable friends, can you keep a secret?

Google Analyticator

OK, so as a preamble. I don’t want to look too excited, but Google Analytics freaking ROCKS.

So I just launched my website. Meaning that after 6 months of playing the guinea fowl / secretive teenager (“I made a website but I’m not gonna give you the address”), I ended up giving the address to my 30 friends. So I have a huge public of 40 people, including friends of friends who will want to double-check that indeed, I have no life.


I purposely omitted to send the link to my grandma, because I was too afraid she would freak out when she would read the word “vibrator”. However I did give the link to my ex boyfriend, because I have always respected his advice, even after we stopped sleeping together.

The next morning, I jumped out of pure sadistic elation when I opened google analytics for the first time. So google analytics is the awesome tool that allows you to track down everyone that’s been reading your website (and let’s face it, very often, to sigh because your website has only been visited by yourself, frantically and 38 times). So I didn’t know, but there is a “location” pin attached to google analytics. And this awesome little tool made me realize that my ex boyfriend being the only individual who lives in Normandy and has access to my website, he did visit uschapters three times. Huhuhu (stupid chuckle).
Noone had told me. Creating a website’s main interest is not to tell stories. It is to access google analytics.