uschapters
Hard times in New York Town

I also survived a war and fought lions

Supersize me – Part 2


Workshop: americanise your CV.

Below, the CV of my daughter Charlotte.

CV1: Charlotte in real life

Nicknames: red, reddy

Skills

  • witnesses any sharp object in the distance and manages to dive to get it in a nanosecond
  • her poop is the exact color of the previous meal

Hobbies

  • running gags (circa pickaboo)
  • oh god this red thing looks so freaking amazing I gotta get it I gotta get it gimme that red thing for Christ’s sake

CV2: Charlotte’s European CV

Diplomas: APGAR test : scored 10 at 0 min, 10 at 10 minutes

Skills

  • One teeth
  • Rolling from lying on back to lying on stomach : advanced
  • Rolling from lying on stomach to lying on back : beginner

Hobbies: Communication through smiles and looks

Miscellaneous: Immunisation record up-to-date

CV3: Charlotte’s American CV

Diplomas

  • APGAR (internationally praised-test ranking babies at birth)

Score 0 minute – 10/10 (summa cum laude – ranked among the highest 1% that year)

Score at 10 minutes – 10/10 (summa cum laude- ranked among the highest 1% that year)

Languages

  • French: understanding: fluent; expression: exceptional understanding of the everyday vocabulary
  • English: understanding: fluent; expression : advanced

Skills

Hobbies

  • Sports : gymnastics (trainings for >4 hours a day)
  • Volunteer activities: free smiles in the subway; contributed to a substantial increase of family happiness

us chapters

us chapters

Leave a Comment